MUSINGS

Things I accomplished this year: Bought a month of tanning at a tanning salon Went on a cruise Had a beautifully planned wedding Spent money on clothing that I put a lot of thought & effort into Found out who my ex really is and released him Changed jobs Successfully adjusted my eating habits Began discovering who I Am. Watched my girl grow up into a young lady Made new friends and let go of false ones Found out love is not a four letter word This year was eye opening.  I walked into it believing that it would be epic.  2013, turned 36 on the 13th....I love numbers and numerology, I naturally assumed that great things were around the corner.  It has been epic for reasons I could never have seen coming.  There have been awakenings for me that were long overdue, or perhaps not.  Perhaps it has all happened exactly as it should have.  My Honey is a firm believer in allowing things to work themselves out as they will.  He doesn't force an...

This is a therapy session.  This is me getting out some aggression, some much needed angst, and some simple "dammit" time.   NO APOLOGIES. NO REGRETS.  He used to hate this song..... aw hell, he used to hate this one too.....                                                Hold on, hold on, do what???                                                Yeah how 'bout that shit...                     Don't think we don't find out and talk and get the story straight                           How'd you do it for so long??? When it's all said and done, guess what, you're not as clever as you t...

There are two things I am vain about:  my looks and my work ethic.  That comes from having a pretty mama and a work-a-holic father.  Yes my father has been a disabled veteran for a long time now, but when he worked, it was from sun up til sun down and had been that way since he was 12 years old.  There's not much my father couldn't do, anything from small engine repair to the finer points of cement distribution.  He also never limited my sister and I.  He assumed because we both had brains and common sense, there was no reason we couldn't be whatever we set out to be, hindered only by self imposed limits.  Like all parents they would look at us from time to time and ask if we reeaally wanted to go do that particular thing...once they got a solid YES!, they'd back off.  They knew we'd sink or swim, either way we'd get ourselves out of any mess. I cannot for the life of me comprehend today's entitlement generation.  I've noticed it ranges fro...

Attrition by Merriam-Webster : Full Definition of ATTRITION 1 [Middle English  attricioun,  from Medieval Latin  attrition-, attritio,  from Latin]  :  sorrow for one's sins that arises from a motive  other than that of the love of God 2 :  the act of rubbing together :   friction ;  also  :  the act of wearing or grinding down by friction 3 :  the act of weakening or  exhausting  by constant harassment, abuse, or attack  <a war of  attrition > 4 :  a reduction in numbers usually as a result of resignation, retirement, or death  <a company with a high rate of attrition > There was a war going on in my life for years.  There was an attempt to wear me down and weaken me.  There were days I couldn't look in the mirror, not because I'd gained too much weight or started to age, but because I hated who looked back at me.  I didn'...

How much catharsis does one have to go through before the spell is finally cast??  We're about to find out I suppose. I think everyone has those days where they doubt their very existence, I assume it wouldn't be normal if we didn't.  What happens when the doubt permeates your daily routine?  There are tons of chipper, happy people wandering the Earth.  It's a safe bet that they can't be that happy constantly.  There have to be low moments to balance out all that sunshine.  Being one such person, when I'm down it throws people off.  I have friends who can't wrap their heads around why I wouldn't be up and chipper and off the cuff...I mean, she's always happy....right? Yes.  As an overall idea, I am always happy.  There are moments however, that I am not the shining example of Pollyanna.  This doesn't mean I need a lecture or a "boosting up" chat.  Maybe I just need a low moment.  Life isn't all sunshine and light all the ti...

I got remarried this weekend.  It's been 4 years since my first marriage ended with my ex walking out and moving in across the road.  We sat and had a talk later that week and he told me we would never get back together.  When he told me that, I said, "OK, it's over".  I haven't looked back since, and after some recent events, I'm grateful I haven't.  I was told several times that the second time around is the best, so far, I believe every word of that. In the last couple of years, I've been called names, my spirituality has been questioned, my resolve has been tested, and so has my faith in it all.  I went from believing that love was just another 4-letter word, to knowing that it is real.  I have found friends in unlikely people, seen the true colours in others, and rekindled relationships that were long overdue.  I walked into my divorce with the notion that I would never, ever remarry.  I assumed that he was the best I would ever do or ...

When you think about the South what comes to mind?  Pretty women in fluffy dresses sitting out on big porches drinking mint juleps?  Cotillion parties, Civil War reenactments, Southern gentlemen opening doors for ladies and children.  Or maybe, it's backward hangups on race, breeding, and family ties.  Well, all of that plays a part in our culture in some way or another. Having been raised in a diverse community, I've seen both sides of the Southern coin.  I know families who wouldn't allow their son or daughter to date outside of their class or community standing.  I'm not talking about the classic father moment, "no boy is good enough for my baby girl".  No, I mean, "well honey, his daddy is a 10th degree Mason and his grandaddy owned half the parish, I reckon he can take you out for a coke."  There have been plenty of unions over the decades where a son marries the local white trash daughter and the family is shamed beyond repair.  They ...